I talk a lot about silencing your inner critic because I (just like so many people) let mine get the best of me. I let her torture me, take away my happiness, ruin relationships (because I convinced myself that I wasn’t liked), & force me to isolate myself (because I convinced myself that I was bad at dealing with people).
That is only a snippet of the things I would let my inner critic say to me. She had full control over my mind and my actions. I didn’t know any better than to listen to her. I believed that my inner critic wanted the best for me. That she was protecting me.
In reality, she was the cause of my self-sabotage and my misery. She was the reason I believed that I could never truly be happy. She was the reason that I reached a place in life where I was just plain stuck.
I had to do a ton of self-healing to get to the place I am now. I dug deep inside to see what life experiences created such a mean inner voice. I worked on healing myself from those experiences and learning some tough life lessons. Eventually, I was able to develop an inner voice that nourished, nurtured, and rooted for me.
We all need an inner voice that operates like an inner cheerleader instead of an inner bully. Think of all the greatness you’d be able to manifest in your life if you had that. Here are 3 things you should stop saying to yourself today…
“When I look better, I’ll do ___”
Stop waiting to be physically perfect (whatever that means) in order to live your life. For those of you who won’t take yourselves shopping or on trips because of how you look….STOP IT. You can enjoy your life at any size.
Life doesn’t require your vision of perfection in order to be lived. When we restrict ourselves from experiencing joy, that can be the biggest cause of what’s keeping us stuck. Get out and enjoy your life, find ways to celebrate how you currently look while working on whatever improvements you’d like to see. Also, make a list of famous people who look like you who have learned to embrace themselves as they are.
“I don’t fit in.”
You are not meant to fit. Some of us are meant to stand out and be different and that’s ok. When you’re around people and you feel out of place, have you ever wondered if the people around you feel out of place too? Most likely, you’ll be surrounded by people who can relate to what you’re feeling.
The point of interacting with other people isn’t to fit into their mold or model your behavior after a group norm. In an ideal situation, human interaction should be about meeting people where they are (mentally, spiritually, & emotionally) and being able to hold space for them, no matter how different they are from you (& vice versa).
We should all work on connecting and holding space for people regardless of their differences. Be the person who learns to appreciate the differences in yourself and in others. Moral of the story: You are enough!!!
Sidenote: Sometimes, the feeling of not fitting in is your intuition telling you that you don’t belong there. But other times, it’s your inner critic finding creative ways to sabotage your happiness and your relationships. When you’re unsure, find a way to silence your mind chatter so that you can hear your inner guidance and let it guide you on what to do next.
“Once I succeed at_____, I’ll start doing ____ more.”
People who say things like this to themselves are guilty of putting their lives on hold until they feel like they’ve reached their goals. Yes, the destination is important, but so is the journey. Allow yourself to enjoy the journey of reaching your goals. You will live a more joyful life if you do.
If you’ve been putting off doing things that you enjoy because you don’t have the finances, work on finding free alternatives. This will help you manifest your goals a lot quicker.
“I’m so bad at____.”
Even if you’re not good at something, what purpose does pointing out that you’re bad at it serve? There is nothing wrong with admitting that something isn’t a strength of yours. But if you’re just learning how to do something (ex: speak a new language, drive a car, etc) don’t judge yourself so harshly in the process.
Have you said any of those things to yourself? What are some of the mean things you find your inner critic? Feel free to share them below. If you’re interested in going deeper down the path of healing your inner voice, check out this program…